Baby Javier

Every month- I think about baby Javier.  I wonder what his life is like.  And if he is healthy.

When McKinley was in the NICU at Childrens, she had a roommate.  Her first roommate was a boy- baby Javier.  Javier was born on June 22nd.  His due date was September 19th.  His mom was 14.  His dad was 15.  They lived in Colorado, but came down to visit the dad's father, who lived in Oklahoma.  The mom thought the long car ride made her go into labor?  Baby Javier was TINY.  He had some heart issues, but they hoped that as he developed, things would get better.

I remember, a day before McKinley's closure surgery, I was standing next to her bed.  Javier's mom was next to his bed.  You see, she could not be up there all the time, like I was.  Since she was only 14, she had to wait for someone to bring her to the hospital, and she could only stay as long as they would let her.  She was scared.  That was one thing we had in common.  We were both scared for our little babies.  I, however, was twice her age.  Knowing how scared and overwhelmed I was- and I had a HUGE support system standing with us through this journey- I could not imagine how a 14 year old little girl felt.  She had a lot of questions about McKinley- obviously.  Although we felt McKinley was super tiny- she was considered a big baby in the NICU.  And then her omphalocele.. needless to say, Javier's mom had never heard of something like it (neither had I.. before the diagnosis).  She told me that her parents and the dads parents were going to be making the trip down from Colorado to meet baby Javier.  She told me how scared she was.  I asked her if she wanted a hug.  She did.  I gave her a big hug and told her our babies would be ok.  That was my prayer anyway.

Both of Javier's parents were in the room when McKinley went down hill quickly after her surgery.  They were in there when we couldnt find a nurse and every possible alarm that could be going off on McKinley was going off.  They were in there when we discovered that when the nurse decided to go to the bathroom, she failed to give her phone (that is linked to all alarms) to any other nurse.  They were in there, when in my drug induced state, I told the nurse she could never leave my baby's side.  I didnt care if she had to go to the bathroom.  (I would like to think I would not say that if I was not so high on pain medicine.. but no promises there..)  I know it was a scary situation for them to watch.  And when they left Javier's side that day, they stopped by and said "I hope your baby will be ok".

Everyday, as I sat by McKinley's bed side for over 10 hours, she would come in with milk she had pumped at home, and have a tiny bit of kangaroo time with Javier.  She loved that baby.  We met Javier's dad's dad and his wife (who was pregnant as well). So Javier's grandmother was pg.

Then Javier's mom and her husband got into town from Colorado.  It was one of our last days in the NICU.  One of my best friends, Stacy, spent the day with me.  She helped me encourage McKinley to eat alot and put on some lbs so we could get home.  At that point, that was all that was holding us back. They pulled their privacy curtain around Javier's mom and had a serious heart to heart with her.  What were her plans?  Was she going to come back to Colorado?  Was she going to finish school?  Who was going to keep the baby?  Hard questions.  Again, I can not imagine being a 14 year old making those decisions.  (Keep in mind, at 14, I am pretty sure I was not even french kissing boys!)

The next day, we were surprised when we were told we would be getting discharged.  Javier's mom didnt make it up to the hospital that day by the time we left.  So I did not get to say bye.  Javier was putting on weight and some of his heart conditions seemed to be getting better.

Every month when I work on paying McKinley's hospital bill down, I think about this little family. I wonder what happened to them?  I wonder if Javier's mom and dad are still together.  I wonder if Javier is healthy.

I knew when we decided that Children's was the best place to medically care for McKinley, that we may see some hard things.  And we did.  And I know that situations like Javier's happen WAY more often that I realize.  I dont know what my part is, in stories like this, but right now, I know that I will continue to think about Javier (even when I am FINALLY done paying off these medical bills), and pray for him, and his future.  And the future of his parents too. :)